Cancer (ish) post 6

 Anyone who has spent a good amount of time around me could tell you I'm a drama queen. I think I used to feel embarrassed about this, but as I've gotten older, I've come to realize that sometimes just being in my feelings and letting them overwhelm me let's me process through the things I'm feeling...also sometimes it's fun to throw a full-scale pity party with streamers, balloons, and a cake. 

I was in Maryland for a few days recently and it was so wonderful to see so many people who've been shaping so much of who I am for the last 13 years. I got to say hello to my baby students! I got to tell them how much I miss them and I wish I could be there. I got some visiting in, but not enough...would there ever have been enough? And then all too quickly, I'm headed home having done too much and simultaneously too little, but such is life. 

I found it hard to capture what it was like to be back in my cozy little room, so I wrote a poem trying to capture a little of how it felt to be back in a place where I was well for so long. I hope anyone reading this gets to have the freedom to feel the things you need to without them overwhelming you.

The dramatic poem:

Ghosts

My room lies empty

Filled with the echos of the girl I was

Hopes and dreams scattered on the floor 

Like shattered glass from a broken vase

That held the flowers and stems of a life filled with potential

Now empty

Now split into hundreds of tiny pieces.

I could glue her back together

But the cracks would always show

Where she was broken